What’s Your Narrative?

As we prepare for a new year, we may find ourselves considering resolutions or setting goals. Resolutions can be tricky. They mean change and sometimes that change does not mean simply altering our actions, it means rewriting our story.

A friend has had the most challenging year of her life. She has garnered great love and sympathy from all those around her and she is appreciative of this support. Recently, she wondered if she would always be seen as that person who tragedy struck. Who, whenever others saw her, felt a heaviness in their hearts and the desire to comfort or utter words of condolence. She is thankful for the kindness, but does not want the story of her loss to be the narrative that defines her.

This mirrors the conundrum that many of us face. We are seen in a certain way. We are expected to be a certain way. Injury or loss may have helped us create a story that hems us into a definition about who and what we are.

What might happen if you did not choose one resolution—like losing weight or gaining a better job—and you resolved to change your story? What might happen if you developed a story about the person who you are underneath the life experiences of tragedy, injury, or extra pounds?

Why rewrite your narrative? Because the story you have been telling yourself over the years may be the story that keeps you from meeting resolutions. It’s the one that provides the excuses: “I’m too busy with work, family, etc to get to the gym.” It’s the one that repeats and reinforces: “I can’t walk because my foot, my shoulder, my big toe causes me trouble.” Yes, busy schedules and true pain are legitimate, but also legitimate is the story that you can create and can resolve to live. For the stories you tell are not only heard through your ears, they are felt through the fibers of your being.

Possibly it is your story–and not the excuses–that keep you from making changes to meet your resolve.

What if, you wanted to believe something else? What if, you wanted to become something else? What if, you changed your narrative and started to live that new story in the year ahead? You may or may not lose the weight or find the better job, but perhaps what you would resolve is finding the story of who you want to become.

What is your narrative?